When I was self medicating, I used the phrase "that wasn't my intention", A LOT. It shifted the focus, the blame, the misunderstanding on to the other person. I wasn't doing this maliciously, it was just "my way" and apparently, I didn't know any better.

Over the years, I have tried to do my best to see MY PART. This isn't always fun or comfortable but in my eyes, necessary for growth and expansion. And just because I own my part doesn't mean that it is received. Sometimes the recipient of my apology would just rather be angry.